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Tuesday, 2 November 2010


When my father passed away, a part of me died forever. I tried to move on, and I did in many ways, but his death shook me like nothing else I could imagine. Every day I think about - what would daddy say about this - or would he approve of that.

Years passed, and his yahrzeit is a milestone. Not just because it's the anniversary of his death, but it was actually the turning point in my life.

Every day meant something important to me. I searched for meaning of my existence. I was starving for real answers - not the nonsense most people pacify themselves with, but real answers.

I conceptualized a new shul, a shul where people actually came to daven - and dragged a friend out of kollel to become the rabbi. A shul that is the pride of its community.

I created a fund for people that were not capable of taking care of themselves. They don't even know from where the help comes.

I became UOJ! Your children and grandchildren will be forever safer, and corrupt rabbonim, eyes twitching, and hands shaking, are looking over their shoulders for the big, bad, scary guy that despises evil and will destroy them for ruining a part of our future generations.

Everything looked different. I became unorthodox in my thinking, and acted upon my feelings with passion and new-found energies. I no longer permitted my mind to be on a leash. I searched. I learned. I read everything meaningful I could get my hands on that I wanted to read before - but was verboten.

I comforted as many people that sought my advice. I made mistakes - because I stepped too far outside the traditional box. But...I don't look back, because I learn from my mistakes; and to live life to the fullest --- one will always make mistakes. I look forward with anticipation of great things to come. I can't change the past, I am only capable of changing tomorrow.

The Democrats will control all three branches of government. Not good at all. To me - it's actually sickening, and I worry for my kids and their kids, but I can't change the facts. There will be a different America - an America that will have lost its identity, as it has under George W. Bush; but worse...much worse. A part of America died tonight, and chances are that we, as a country, will not recover the glory past.

Make your lives more meaningful. Do what you thought you could never do. Dig deep, you'll be amazed at the things you're able to do, that you thought were impossible. Be kinder, help as many people as you can. Read, learn meaningful things, love your children and family more. Give a damn! Do something positive tomorrow that you would not have done yesterday!

I miss my father and I will miss the America I grew up in.

November 4, 2008 - another yahrzeit that will probably live with me forever.




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